Unless you have at least 12 points don't even bother demanding anything from this government. That is the lesson we can glean from ongoing agitations across the country.
It all started with the Maoists raising their 40 demands in 1996. The Deuba government at that time was willing to go along with almost all of those demands, including one that said "All Nepalis should be equal immeditately."
But that wasn't enough to satisfy the comrades who took the country to war, and along the way we had the 12-point MoU in Delhi, the 9-point agreement between the eight parties, and then The Fierce One came up with his own 22-point demand on which there was major disagreement with Girjau and hence the present stalemate.
The Ass' latest count is that various janajati groups cumulatively have a total of 108 demands. Tallying the ten-point demand of the Cobras, the 15-point demand of the Tigers, the seven-point demand of the Forum, and the 12 and 16 demands respectively of the Goit and Jwala factions we have a total of 60 demands. Add to that the demands of the Badis, Kamaiyas, Dalits, Muslims, Women, Maoist victims, Victims of Maoists, Petroleum tanker drivers, Gays and Lesbians and you have demands running in several thousands. The Ass' main demand is that all these demands be consolidated into one demand. Only then is there some chance, slim though it may be, that it will be fulfilled.
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As expected, the comrades decided to pull the plug on themselves at their Grand-Mass Meeting. Good for them. This shows maturity and quick learning of the ways of coalition politics. They must have learnt this from Italy, which after all is Gramsci territory, that if you don't like the way preparations are going for elections you walk out of government and play the underdog against the statusquoists. And you know what, this strategy may actually work.The Ass reported last week about unusually reliable sources that His Fierceness was down with hypertension or spondilitis, or both. But that wasn't the reason he was absent from Tundikhel, he was deep in negotiations with Girijau on when and how to declare a republic. One of the proposals the prime minister has put out is to prevail upon Kingji to quietly slip out of the country on a health-related visit at least till elections. The Shah dynasty ancestral village in Rajasthan may be a perfect place to chew the cud.
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Nepal's national airline may be ailing but it has a claim to fame: it has taken Nepali aviation to the age before the Wright Brothers. It also made a major public relations coup by inviting international reporters to the hangar when they sacrificed a black goat on the nose landing gear of the 757 so it would not develop anymore snags. The news travelled around the world and was even printed in the Frankfurter Allgemeine Zeitung and was much talked about. This is the kind of promotion for Nepal's tourism that money can't buy. The Ass hears that even Boeing has taken note of this supernatural method of aircraft maintenance and may include the procedure in its Operator's Manual......
The Ass, being wise beyond his ears, has just heard through the tarai grapevine that the JTMM-Jwala has taken responsibility for the Nokia phone battery that exploded last week, injuring a user.
ass@nepalitimes.com 
